Time... or lack there of

Time is a funny thing.  In this world of overscheduled over achievers, we don't think we have a lot of time.

I get many reactions to my knitting.  I think people are drawn to people doing stuff with their hands.  The funniest reaction I normally get is, "Oh I would never have enough time to do that." "Wow, you must have a lot of free time."  Those who know me best, know that is definitely not the case.  The fact is that I am a multi tasker -- it comes with my ADD -- and I can knit while doing other things.  But, I also make time for it.

The same comes when spending time in prayer.  "Oh, I can't commit to that much time in prayer."  "I got busy and forgot."  " I had other things to do and didn't have the time."  I have made all these excuses.  I will probably make all these excuses again a million times in the course of my life.  Or, even a better excuse -- "I had more important things to do."

If anyone looks at the course of their day, really looks at it, they will see a whole lot of idle time.  There are times where we find ourselves randomly checking useless websites.  There are times where we watch a rerun of Reba for the 300th time (yes, I am guilty).  There are times where we just lay in bed and are too lazy to get up or too lazy to think anything concrete.

This morning I woke up at 6 am.  I tossed and turned for 10 minutes refusing to believe that I could not go back to sleep.  I realized Cade and Jody would be in bed for at least 30 more minutes so I decided it was time to pray.  I make this time for myself everyday.  Sometimes it is sadly only 10 minutes before I get interruption.  BUT, I always make the time.  I found my comfy spot on the couch and started reading the book from my Spiritual Director.

This is the point where God reminded me of this time thing.  The chapter was on Mary and Martha.  Mary sat in the presence of Jesus.  She gave all she had to Jesus.  This frustrated Martha.  Martha knew that there were things that had to get done and yet Mary just sat there.  I began to remember the little people wondering how I could have time to knit.  I began to remember all of my excuses for why I don't make time to pray or spend time in God's presence.

There are times in our lives where we would like to believe that we have it all together.  We want to believe we are on the right path and doing ALL the right steps to get there.  The fact is... I will NEVER have it all together.  I will always fall off the path.  But, I will look for God in all of those instances.  I will search and find God in the depths of my screwed up life and rest in that peace.

AMEN